White chicks :D

I'm gonna have a BF!

Marcus Copeland: Oh, my God, she's gonna have a bitch fit!

Hotel clerk: No, don't d-d-d-don't have a, a, a BF now.

Kevin Copeland: I wanna speak to your supervisor! Better yet, I'm gonna write a letter!

Marcus Copeland: You, are in big, trouble!

Kevin Copeland: Dear Mister Royal Hampton. I am a white woman, in America.
______________________________

Latrell Spencer: Once you go black, you gonna need a wheelchair.

______________________________

Heather Vandergeld: Look who just flew in from the slums of Beverly Hills.

Megan Vandergeld: It's the Beverly Ho-Billies.

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Squeeze me?

Kevin Copeland: [as Brittany Wilson] Oh no, you didn't?

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] I'm sorry, but uhm... we just saw your new video. Yea, they had a screening over at Saks Fifth Avenue in the security office
[laughs]

Marcus Copeland: A klept-ho-maniac!
[laughs]

Megan Vandergeld: [arrogantly] Your mother shops at Saks.

Marcus Copeland: [indignantly]
[as Tiffany Wilson]

Marcus Copeland: What?
[the Vandergeld sisters proudly do siss-fingers]

Kevin Copeland: [as Brittany Wilson] Oh my God. You want to talk about mothers? You wanna talk about mothers! It's mother time, okay! Your mother's so dumb she went to Dr Dre for a Pap smear! "Something's wrong, Dr Dre! My coochie's doing a beatbox!"

Heather Vandergeld: Well yea? Your mother's so stupid she exercises when she could just get like, liposuction or something!

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Your mother's so old that her breast milk is powdered. You breast-feed like this:
[blows powder from hand, and everyone starts to laugh]

Heather Vandergeld: Your mother is so, like... She's so...
[to Megan]

Heather Vandergeld: Megan you go!

Megan Vandergeld: Your mother is so stupid that she goes to Barney's Rooftop Deck Restaurant for lunch and orders a niçoise salad and calls it a 'ni-coise' salad. 'Ni-coise' salad, right?

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Your mother's ass is so hairy, it looks like Don King's about to pop out and say, "Only in America!"

_________________________________

Marcus Copeland: You hit like a bitch! C'mon.

_________________________________

Tori: I am so glad I got waxed today.

Karen: Ugh, me too. What did you get?

Tori: The Bald Eagle.

Karen: I got the Bermuda Triangle.

Lisa: The Landing Strip.

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] I got the Buckwheat.
Karen: Ewww, that's sick.

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Ahh, what a beautiful sunny day!
[shadow falls over body]

Marcus Copeland: Oh, my God, what happened to the sun? Ahh!

Latrell Spencer: Easy white chocolate, I wouldn't want you to melt.

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Yeah, hasta la vista Schwarzenegro. Okay, bye.

________________________________

Tiffany Wilson: I am so... frick-in'... pissed!
________________________________

Kevin Copeland: [as Brittany Wilson] Sweetie! You've got to slow up with those cosmos!

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] Tee-hee! Oh, fine.

Kevin Copeland: [as Brittany Wilson] Brittany and Tiffany Wilson, checking in!
[slams into postcard and knick-knack holder, scattering items *loudly* across reception desk with his fake breasts]

Kevin Copeland: Sorry, um, they're new. Dr. Dorfman did an amazing job.

Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson, squeezing Brittany's fake breasts] Feels so real!